If I shot the sheriff, I wouldn't write a song about it let alone talk about the deputy.
If I thought the sky was falling, the only thing I'd be shouting is "move bitches get out the way, I gotta find me a cave"
If I was in the happening, I would have acted better than Mark Wahlberg and those bloody trees would have been shitting acorns.
If I was a director, I would have taught the guy who filmed cloverfield how to steady the camera, also I would have actually had some cloves in the movie, also I would have had an actual plot and the chick would have died from her wounds before the bomb blew them up.
If I was on a planet full of apes, I would bring some bananas with me.
If I was darwin, I would have had a pet beagle aboard the HMS Beagle
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