jimmy and another girl

And so, I'm writing again.

It's never a good sign when I feel the need to write in this space. The cumulative effect of so many repressed thoughts and feelings burning, yearning for an escape leaves a bitter aftertaste in my mouth.

How lovely would it be to go a day without feeling? To be numb within this hollowed cavity that houses the rhythmic pulse of life. To freeze all thought, emotion and vice.

I do not understand my need to desire the things that are not meant for me. And by this of course I refer to women. Woman, if I'm being honest.

Yes, I've gone and done it again. Allowed my wretched heart to disobey my far nobler and wiser mind.

You would think after the last female to enter my life and the heart wrenching pain she caused me when she left, my heart would have been less foolish to have loved so quickly again and be slightly wiser about who he choose to love. Alas, it would appear my heart who I fondly refer to as Jimmy the Jackass has gone and started loving some new girl. Without my mind's consent to boot. Which by itself is not a bad thing. I don't think loving a person is a bad thing. It's commendable to love others but allowing romantic feelings to develop that's where I draw the line.

Jimmy, forlorn Jimmy feels deep emotion for what my mind Kerc as I've named him, recognizes as a genuinely nice girl. So you might wonder what's the problem? Well I'll tell you. Jimmy here has gone and picked yet another woman who doesn't know he exists and won't reciprocate his feelings. Plus some other complications best not mentioned for the woeful state they put us in. And so he aches. This annoys me and my mind as we really want to get on with our collective lives.

I do have bigger to fish to fry and falling in love surely isn't on the menu. No matter how great the girl might seem. And there in lies the problem, they all seem great. Seem being the operative word.

Seriously Jimmy... get a grip. We can't deal with anymore hurt. Time to drop the feelings like a bad habit. The exams are coming and we're going to need all of us in top fighting condition.